Have you ever had one of those days when you feel so stupid, even though you know deep down that you aren't completely stupid?
I hate algebra. Actually, I don't mind algebra, but I hate polynomials. Gah. The damn book isn't making sense to me, and then my mom and I fight over something in the book. And then I get depressed. I start feeling worthless.
And then my mom and I fight over post-secondary. I was trying to tell her that I only wanted to take nightschool courses and that's it, but I guess I sounded like I was saying that I didn't want to take any courses, because she said, "How are you getting into university then?" And I find it hard to tell her that I'm interested in music, and radio, and acting, because I feel like if I tell her what I'm really, really interested in, she'll just discourage me. Like when I said I should try out for the next season of Canadian Idol if they have tryouts in town again, and I seem to recall her saying that I have no vocal training, so I shouldn't try out. Uh, a lot of people who try out for Canadian Idol have no training.
Maybe I don't want to be a florist, a butler, or a bricklayer. Don't get me wrong, they're great careers, I just feel that I wouldn't be happy in those fields.
Doesn't she understand? I'm not happy. I feel like I'm not good enough for university, and that I'll never be good enough.
I'M NOT HAPPY!
I feel a little better now.
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3 comments:
Dude! We're both doing polynomials (I hate them too) AND I also use the Key Curriculum.
Merenwen-
I'm at a liberal arts school for creative writing. Do you know how long it took me to convince my parents that it was a good idea?
So long!
You should tell your parents. If they discourage you, you just have to remember that it is your life, and you have to live it, and be the one who wakes up to go to your job every morning. You deserve to have a career you love.
With any luck, your parents will understand eventually. Mine did. It took a while, but I didn't give up because writing is something that I really want to do and won't be happy if I'm not doing.
I hope everything works out for you.
-Susan
heh. algebra makes me depressed, too.
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